Your analysis of Elio’s emotional development is strong, but I think you need to be a bit more critical of your own ideas. You often explain what the internal monologue shows, but you don’t always stop and ask how effective it is in showing his development, or why Aciman chooses to present it this way. I’d also be careful about presenting Elio’s development as four clear stages, because your own analysis actually shows that his feelings are much more messy and complicated than that. Try to keep coming back to the research question and ask yourself: so what does this tell me about how effective internal monologue is in showing Elio’s emotional development? That extra step would make your evaluation much stronger